This memorandum recommends classification of the website satansjamaicanasshole.com as a Minor Metaphysical Attractor under CEAP’s Tier 2.b protocol. The site has been monitored by CEAP staff since November 2023 in response to anomalous traffic patterns first identified by the Center’s automated indicators. The site itself is, by every conventional metric, unremarkable: traffic volume is modest, monetization is absent, and the content is principally devotional in nature and aggressively low in production value. CEAP nevertheless recommends classification at Tier 2.b for the reasons set out below.
(1) Visitors to the site exhibit measurable post-visit behavioral changes in 14–19% of cases (n=1,247), with the modal change being a sustained inability to clearly remember whether they have visited the site. (2) The site appears in fewer than 0.03% of search-engine results for its own URL, despite being indexed. (3) Three independent academic citations to the site have appeared in print since 2024 from authors who do not, when contacted, recall having written them.
Tier 1 classification is reserved for phenomena with measurable downstream effects on policy outcomes, election results, or critical infrastructure. The site has not, to CEAP’s knowledge, produced such effects. CEAP notes, however, that the absence of measurable effects in the case of a Minor Attractor is not a stable property and should be re-evaluated at six-month intervals.
(1) No public statement. (2) Quarterly re-review. (3) Coordination with the Center for Internet Safety on whether a content advisory is warranted (CEAP’s view: no — an advisory would constitute the kind of attention the site appears to consume). (4) Continued passive monitoring of the site’s marquee element, which CEAP staff have come to consider the site’s most informative single feature, and which CEAP is unable to reliably read.